Thursday, June 11, 2020
Deep sympathy from Jim and Robyn (Shand) Apffel
Please accept my most sincere sympathy, to all of David's beloved family. We all shall miss him dearly. I reconnected with David in 2005, and when Jim and I visited him in Brattleboro on our way to Portland ME to visit our eldest son, David gave me the longest hug I have ever had. After that, every time we drove north from NJ, we visited David as a vital part of our routine.
My memories of David date back to 1961 when I fortuitously landed in his English class at West Morris Reg HS. I loved being in his class and learned the finer points of English grammar and writing from him that excused me from the English Composition course in college. Since he lived a mere block away from me in Mendham, friends and I would often visit him at home just for his company. I believed then, and I believe now that he knew absolutely everything.
Every time I walk into my kitchen/dining room, decorated like the African savannah with zebras, giraffes, and other African animals, I smile at the memory of the year David spent in Liberia. Because I had been faithful in writing to him while he was away, he gave me a choice of wooden hand-carved masks he had brought back with him. Turns out, I chose the mask of the goddess of fertility. I guess that explains my three sons.
Although it meant my husband Jim and I would not get to see him on the way to visit Kirk, I was glad when David decided to relocate to Webster. It eased my mind to know he would be close to family, and I was 100% certain that he would maintain his independence for as long as possible. He did just that. Then Kirk told us that he was relocating to Buffalo at precisely the same time, so our visits with David continued. David heartily accepted Jim, loving him as he did me.
When I was diagnosed with cancer in 2014, David got right onto his computer and researched the surgeon I was considering. He wouldn't rest until he had found a video of my doctor, and then he gave me an enthusiastic thumbs up. I knew for sure that my decision had been made. When I put together a book of poems and photos, reflections on life and cancer, David proofread the poems for me, giving me excellent suggestions. Still, I never felt as if he read any of my correspondence with a critical eye. He simply relished the communication.
I know David's passing has left a big hole in your hearts as he has in Jim's and mine. We will miss our visits with him at lunchtime, usually something we purchased at Wegmans, except for the few times I made him a cake, which he squirreled away in the freezer for later consumption. I have loved David deeply, and will miss him. The world has lost a great treasure, but he will be remembered by many.
